Monday, 13 July 2015

Mama Love

Being a mother is a new experience for me, there are a lot of firsts, new experiences and questions on an hourly basis! As hard and as tiring as it can be I am loving it and I feel that I have adapted to this change quite well, as has my husband, Aiden.




A short number of weeks after we got married I found out I was pregnant. To say I was shocked, in a good way, was an understatement. The excitement was unbelievable! I remember the night that I found out, the first thing I did was to go look up baby stuff on the internet! If we had planned on getting pregnant I don't think it would have happend so easily, luckily for us it worked out well having a "honeymoon baby"!

When I was pregnant people would always offer advice and the most common phrases that I heard, and got sick of hearing, were:
 "it'll be such a massive change"
"you're never be prepared for it"
"The time flies"
"They grow up so fast"
"Are you ready for 18 years of sleepless nights"
"Sleep when the baby sleeps"
I got so tired of hearing the same things over and over again but weirdly I now find myself saying those exact things to any pregnant women's that I meet. I'm a walking contradiction really!

It's true though, as much as I thought I was ready for the lack of sleep, I wasn't. All those trips to the bathroom, during the night, in no way prepared me for being up at stupid o'clock and only getting an hour of sleep here and there. I was very naive to think that I was ready for such a huge change in my life. And that old saying, "sleep when the baby sleeps", is great in theory but in practice it doesn't work, well for me it didn't!



Its so true that every pregnancy is different, as is every birthing experience. I had a very easy pregnancy but I cannot say the same for birthing experience! Most people would not have known I was pregnant until I was 6 months. I had little or no bump but once I hit the 6 months the bump just "popped"! Just before I gave birth I ended up looking like I was having twins! I hated when people would say "oh my god you are HUGE", needless to say I was very hormonal and got irritated at the littlest things!

Colin was a big baby, 9lbs 10oz and I had him by vacuum. I went I to the hospital early on a Friday morning but didn't give birth until Sunday morning, it also happened to be Fathers Day! There's no need to go into the details but lets just say that it was horrendous! I was in labour for 53 hours, enough said!

Thank god for pain relief! Looking back now I often smile a different things that happened in the hospital. One such example was: the midwives would constantly ask "on a scale on 1-10 how would you rate your pain"? Of course I would always say it was somewhere between 8-10 but how did I really know? I had never given birth, I had never even broken a bone or had stitches, so I had nothing to compare the pain against! To me that was always a silly question to a first time mom but I'm wiser to all that now and at the end of the day I know that the midwives were only doing their job.

I know a lot of mothers seem to breeze through the birth and recovery period afterward but for me it took 8 weeks before I could comfortably sit down without my C-shaped cushion! I had no interest in going out either, I was happy and content having a glass of wine at home. It sometimes felt to me that it was a competition between women as to who got back out the fastest. Taking my time suited me just fine, especially since I breastfed, which was exhausting.

It's funny because growing up I had at least 2 friends, we all know someone like them, who just wanted to get married and have children. Theyeven had their baby names picked out, I never felt like that. I felt that, when the time was right I would be ready. Yes it was an amazing shock when it finally did happen but I was ready!

With all that being said, I wouldn't change it for the world. Colin is a great little baby and brings so much joy on a daily basis. His smile is infectious. It's amazing how, without even knowing, one small tiny baby can bring a smile on even the dullest of days! Love is waking up knowing that his kisses and cuddles are waiting and the best part is that they are unlimited!

It's such a fantastic time for everyone involved and I wouldn't change any of it, even the horrible birthing experience! I'm off work today because my little man is sick and even so he is the best,most smiley, happy baby! He is a joy and I know and hope that all mothers feel the overwhelming feeling of love for their children that I feel for Colin!


My advise to any first time mothers is this:
- only do what you feel is right for you and your baby
- never listen to other peoples birthing story horrors
- don't worry about the labour and birth itself you will do it and you will be surrounded by professionals
- don't be a martyr, if you feel that you want pain relief then take it
- don't feel pressurized to breastfeed, if it's not right for you that's OK
- if breastfeeding doesn't work for you that's OK too, it works for some but not others
- rest up as much as possible before the birth, you will need all of your strength and energy
- don't be afraid to ask for help
- have a cry every so often, don't always try to be the rock, you are human too
- be proud of what you have done and what you are doing, never let anyone make you feel that you have do e something wrong
- take some "me time", even a relaxing bath will work wonders
- don't put too much pressure on yourself
- don't go crazy buying every gimmick, a baby only needs love, food, sleep and nappy changes, they don't know how expensive your equipment was
- go for walks before and after giving birth
- enjoy being a new mom, it's amazing!

Happy mothering!

Until the next time, always remember to be: 

Dee-Termined To Glam & Glow

Dee x

4 comments:

  1. I always loved the comments! Most of them went in one ear & out the other for me, lol!!
    Being a mammy is the best job & the payment is priceless with hugs & smiles :-)

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    1. For some reason they used to annoy me,I was probably way too hormonal! I love being a mother, it's the best!

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  2. Loved this Denise, and Colin is just adoreable! Lots of great advice in there and it's too true, being a parent is the toughest job one will ever do but definitely the best and most rewarding!! Thanks for sharing (ps I know Ur pain re vac delivery, mine was after 3.5days in labour, no horror story included lol) xx

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    1. Thanks Grainne! It's such an amazing feeling being a mother and I'd suffer it all again!

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